Late...

Man came back almost 12 midnight last night. Last minute rush, he and his 2 peers got to make sure all work is done to ensure the aircraft is safe to take off.

However tired and sleepy I was, I stayed up as I would love to chat with him, even if it's for a minute. This is the least I can do as a wife, to be there for him and listening, updating and simply; be around.

Some friends asked why is he always so busy? They do not understand as their better half holds an office desk job that gives them weekend as family day. I used to mind and envy them. I guess I may still do at times, but I have also accepted that this is his job - staggered shift.

More than once, I ever asked myself "Can I be the kind of wife he needed?" No answer required, as this is a role I have to play - a wife, a mom and a pillar to the household.

Through the years, I have accepted my fate that I will be left very much independent to handle most things myself. I am not complaining. I am thankful. Despite being so busy, he is always there to render me his support and a shoulder for me to cry on.

This pasture that I have chosen 9 years ago is not the greenest, however is the most reliable piece I can ever asked for.

My temperament has also mellowed because of my current plight. Having children who is gradually understanding the Dad's job nature also helped as we will encourage each other when his presence is missed.

He always thank me for being there taking care of our lil ones and making sure they do not miss the fun of not having a Dad around. Little does he know, he is a super star to his kids, and an unsung hero of mine.

Love lots Dear!

Primary One Ended!!!

Now I can understand how some friends felt when they shared their stress and anxiety when their kids progressed to primary school, especially so during the examination period.

True enough, I felt as if I am in a pressure cooker especially the month during her final year assessment.

Glad thing is, this year has been a great year for us. For Ethyl has been working hard on her own of course it's packaged with my nagging and reminders), yet we had a good year.

She may not have top the P1 cohort, but there are subjects that she aces.

I hope she finds learning as interesting and remains so enthusiastic and a lil more diligent for P2.

She shall for now enjoy her birthday weekend and we will work hard together in Y2012!

It's a Blessing

It's mixed feelings for me on an early Friday morning.

The loss of 2 pretty girls.

To think that I even thought of doing silly thing to my lil Bud. However, I am glad I only have such thought, never the courage.

I will love my kids with my life. They are my everything!

I will also remember, I am a Mother!

Mom's Dark Side

I love my kids.

When faced with stress and some personal issues, I cannot believe I harbored and evil thought - remove this accidental #3.

This set me into some kind of low spirits. No, I have yet sunk into depression (at least I thought), I am a rather strong willed person hence I felt depression will leave me alone at least for now.

Deep in my heart, I know I can't bear. Hubby didn't try to talk to me about this after knowing my thoughts, he merely replied my whatsapp saying it is a little to late as baby has formed into human shape and told me not to do things that will make me regret for the whole of my life.

Till today, I still do get a little emotional. Just because he is so busy with work and unable to have a proper chat with me and trying to find out how I am doing in this pregnancy or even how my days are. I began wondering has this got to do with age catching up? I was never like this in my earlier pregnancies.

I can't talk to many people about this. Only when chatting with a few closer girlfriends, I do reveal my thoughts and some emotional struggles. Indeed it is a way to let go of some steam, however it is never enough comparing it to talking to him.

Seeing how stressful he gets from work, I can't bear to load him with more stress. I can only bear all these quietly.

Will he ever know? I really doubt so. It has probably slipped his mind that I used to pen down my thoughts on this cyber space.

Not to worry, I won't remove the baby. I have decided to take on this journey bravely with my baby. A Mom has to be able to protect their offspring and not hurt them.

Bravely I will...set a positive example for my kids.

Busy In the Kitchen

I re-ignited my hobby in bento-making lately after a group of friends started making bento for their loved ones.





The above are some creations I have made over the weeks.

Term 4 is rather tiring for me. Besides progressing into trimester 2, Ethyl has netball practices twice a week, hence I got to send her bento during her one-hour break before the school starts.

Time is never enough for me. However I do enjoy the time I spent with them right now :-)

Cheesy Chicken/Pork Rolls

Here is the recipe for the cheesy chicken roll!

I added ham as well cos the kids love ham & cheese! Could have added more cheese...this particular roll had lesser cheese.

Ingredients:

• Palm size lead meat/Chicken thigh about 1.5 - 2 cm thick
• 1/2 teaspoon Light Soy Sauce
• 2 tablespoon plain yogurt
• 2 slice Sliced Cheese (I used Cheddar Cheese here)
• 3 slices of Ham
• 1 Egg, beaten
• Plain Flour for dusting
• Breadcrumbs for coating
• Oil for deep frying

How to do it:

• Spread yogurt on the meat together with the seasoning in a ziplock bag and mix them all together.
• Leave for 10 minutes.
• Place cheese & ham on one side of the meat. Try to keep the cheese away from the side as it will melt and sip through the meat when you fry.
• Fold the meat.
• Dust with flour.
• Dip in beaten egg.
• Coat well with breadcrumbs.
• Deep fry till it turns golden brown (you can also try baking it for healthier option)
• Serve immediately.

Original recipe adopted from Wokking Mum.

The Kids Simply Amuses Me

I am seldom right about judging my boy. He, is a loving boy, yet very temperamental. One thing I never expect from him, is his readiness to show his love for the lil Bud. To him, I believe "baby" is something that exists in my tummy, out of his imagination how Bud will look like except the general concept and impression of the baby posters he has been seeing out in the malls (if there is).

Ethyl as usual, is the loving sister who hugs and kisses my stretch-marked-disfigured tummy and "chats" with the lil Bud on whatever that comes to her mind.

Brayden on the other hand, is very generous with his hugs and kisses when I thought he will be more reserved in this area. Indeed he is reserved with his words. Ethyl can tell a LONG story to my tum, yet Brayden will only says, "Good Baby, kor kor loves you!"

Lately there has been little fluttering in my tum, I deduced it is Bud who is performing some kungfu fighting in wombsville. How sweet to have such feeling all over again!

As I was immersing in the attention given to me by Hubs and the kids, I was pleased to hear the siblings discussing on how to share the load and help look after Bud when she arrives.

E said "Didi, you help Mommy feed baby one week, I take over the next week ok?"

B obligingly "Ok. So I feed baby milk? I use my milk bottle and feed baby milk?"

E trying to explain "No, Mommy will buy new bottle for baby. You feed baby using the new bottle ok?"

B a lil confused "So baby don't drink breast milk and drink Brayden's milk? I share my milk?"

E kinda-frustrated "Listen, Mommy will give baby breast milk, you just sayang baby when baby drink milk ok? I will feed."

B innocently "I also want to drink breast milk. I give baby my milk ok? Can share one you know?"

E gave up "When baby come out then I tell you again! You don't understand me!"

I sat on the bed, laughing at both...