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May 28, 2008

Stress

Due to Brayden's persistent cough, and people around kept asking about his condition, I felt stressful. Especially when the concern is like reprimanding me for not taking good care of MY OWN SON!

I have told Hubby that I am the one carrying him during pregnancy, I am the one who suffers from the pain of delivering him, why would I not take care of him?

We have seen 3 docs for his cough previously, and yesterday, I decided to sought for medical aid again. He can't continue coughing like that.

Our pead was on leave, so I asked Jan if she knew there was a pead clinic at CCK area which is nearer to me. Helpful her helped me search for info on the clinic, and also the reviews of the doc. Positive reviews; thus I called Hubby and told him we are going to this doc in the evening.

I guess this is an arrangement. He is the only doc thus far who made me feel more relieved to leave Brayden in his healing hands. He was patient, listening to us and our previous diagnosis from different avenues and the lack of information for the ail, leaving all of us helpless looking at the baby suffering.

Brayden coughed twice during the consultation. Dr Winston Ng saw how he coughed and he says for his age, he is coughing quite badly. He changed his prescriptions after that...we were given antibiotics and a follow up appointment for him. At the very least, we were given some meds for the phlegm, antibiotics to help fight the virus, and ventolin to help open up his airways.

Strange for a Mommy to feel better when the newborn was put on antibiotics right? If you were in my shoes, I guess you will feel the same...everything that would help clear the cough after 2 weeks of helpless-ness, you will try.

Sounds of concern is still appreciated, but voices of concerns sounds like "I don't care about my son" or "I do not know how to take care of my son", please go away...

13 comments:

LZmommy said...

OF coz you care for your son, Fannie... Don't be upset ya... I understand how you feel when ppl around you keep asking...

Hope Brayden will recover soon...

Anonymous said...

Hey Fannie... Hope you are feeling better now... I understand how you are feeling because Jerick's first year is not easy as he had this very bad phlegm that seems to go on forever... People kept asking and pressing, making me so frustrated at time...
Don't be upset... Take care and hope your little guy will recover soon...

blurblur said...

*hugs*....you definitely care about your son, Fannie! Just turn a deaf ear to those who sounds 'reprimanding', shoo them away, block them away...such people are just so insensitive ya...

Do take care of yourself too, Fannie. And big hugs to Brayden and Ethyl...

Get well real soon, Brayden!

Anonymous said...

i know how u feel... and i hate it when comments such as :" he's not well bcos he wore too little etc etc" came into my ear. I can't resist but to rebuke with " just leave them alone! that's not the case, nobody wants to see a little baby ill... etc etc.." and you shd know who commented the above.

just ignore those. we know it has been hard. As mummies, we all know how it feels to when we can't do anything to help the little one get better.

Kenji is still coughing away at night too, and i get all sorts of suggestion on why he is coughing : i drink too much cold drink, i give baby cold milk, i wore too little for him etc etc... i just sweep all those away.

Take care and may little brayden bounce back real soon

MomsyWorld said...

Thanks for the words of console Mommies...

Ivy, it is really frustrating whenever she harps on things like that.

There was once she came and saw Bray coughing, she said I drink cold drinks...I asked her "can i drink cold drinks during confinement?" She zipped...why would I want to harm my own child?

For the cold milk part...I heard from her as well and tried to explain that heating the EBM too hot will "kill" the antibodies...somehow she doesn't understand...sigh...now whenever Brian says he wanan go back, I am really unwilling to.

She kept telling Brian that we have to look after him, must do this, do that...does she know that I didn't dare sleep well? Does she know that I'd jump up from the bed whenever Bray coughs? Does she know that I would carry Bray in my arms to sleep so that to ensure that he'd feel warm enough and feels better? Does she know the amount of tears I shed when I see him suffering like that? Her concern becomes insensitive when it travels to me.

Anonymous said...

It seems like No. 2 will always get sick earlier than No. 1. My 7-mth old boy is still coughing since he caught the virus from his sister 2 mths ago. He has seen both western docs and chinese senseh and has taken more than 6 courses of meds. I've lost count really... He seems to be better when on chinese meds. But I believe the antibiotics will do the trick. Brayden will get well very soon. Cheer up dear.

Anonymous said...

Don't be too upset Fannie. If I were you, I would feel very stressed too. It's tough to deal with an interfering MIL. Take care and hope Brayden will get well soon. *hugs*

Valencia said...

*Hugs* ignore them. Easier said then done I know, but its not worth getting upset over these things. We will always get such insentive remarks from older folks or even (worst) passer-bys. Ultimately, we know that we are the best care-giver to our kids, and that's all we need to know.
You are doing a GREAT job there, so chin up;-) and enjoy your two little angels!

BTW, just to share and not sure if you know, but the Vapour rub on feet with socks on, has worked wonders on both my dd and hubs. Give it a try if you've not. Its a great remedy.
Let me know if you need more info.

Michelle said...

Hi fannie,

Come on! u are a great mom, seeing how smart and lovely ethylyn we all already know you are doing a great job as a mom. I believe brayden will also be like ethylyn too. :)

But i think your mil is not reprimanding at u. Think of it if she don't love and care about your son will she say all these to u?

Old ppl are like that de, we youngster just hve to give them our ears to listen. (they always like 'we' to listen to their advice de).

U got to be positive for urself and the family so that u can carry on arh.

Anonymous said...

Hi Fannie, I am sorry to know Bray is not well and still coughing. Try to put some thick vicks under his feet and wear socks to sleep. It does help with cough.

As long as you have already done your best to take care of Bray, don't be too bothered by what other wld say. Usually, such comments you will be able to put them aside but at this time, when you are not able to sleep well, eat well and tiredness gets into the way, such comments is not very pleasant to hear.

Don't take it to heart because the one who will suffer is you (the hearer) not the one who say it.

We wld usually react strongly to comments that are unpleasant esp when we are trying to be a good mum to our children but things doesn't turn out well esp when they are not well. It makes us harder to swallow comments.

Take heart, we all go thru the same esp during the 1st few mths... things will get better. If you feel stressful going back, stay away for a while till Bray is better or well and you gets enough rest to handle things... Take care, Fannie. Not easy but hang in there!

nana said...

Hi Fannie,

Hope Brayden is getting better, with the change of meds. It's really heart wrenching to see the little 1 fall sick, but you must take care of yourself too, ok.

As for those unpleasant remarks, I can understand how u feel. I often get the blame too, when my kids fall sick... but trust me, aft some years of 'training', i m actually practising the "filtering" mthd quite well.... that is - 1 ear in, 1 ear out...

Actually, the old folks meant well, they juz do not know how to put wrds in a more sensitive manner. It's good that you're pouring it out, but make sure whatever you pour out dun get back into you. Cheer up! =)

Anonymous said...

Hey, don't care about what they says. We know that all mothers love their kids especially you! :)

Cheer up. He will get well soon! Please take care of your own health as well!

anne said...

hi, been following ur blog as fellow mum of 2 boys. Take heart. U r doing a great job..my 2nd bb came out c-sec with wet lung and antibiotics too..chin up and hugs for brayden