How I Felt

It is not easy for me to sit down here and write this post actually. I am trying my very best to control my emotions. I was still traumatised by this whole event that my little boy had to go through. This is NO JOKE!

When Dr Tang volunteered to call Hubby for the first time when the wound opened up, it didn;t occur to the man that he should come and stay by my side. Though there is nothing he can do to make me feel good, at least his presence is there and I will feel more comforted.

The wound itself was hollow as the lump was "giant cells" (as described in the histology) but non-cancerous. The lump was too huge and thus after removing, the tissues were too far apart for Dr to stitche back, so we were hoping that the inside of the wound would heal up nicely by iteslf.

I saw how deep and raw the "hole" was. Letting a 11 month old to bear which such pain is really too much! I wish I were the one who suffers from all these on his behalf!

Hubby's words over the phone didn't help. After Dr tang spoke to him, he asked me the SAME things all over again. How am I to tell him what had just happened to our son all over again?!

Dr Tang kept asking if I was alright. How can I be?! Even when I told them I am fine, I am NOT! They all said I am very brave and strong to be so calm under such a circumstance. How can I not be? Should I be crying together with my baby? Should I also be screaming with him because we are both in pain?

I had to stay poised in order to calm my baby. The support from my colleagues were great! I really appreciate them accompanying me through the toughest waiting time.

I just hope the wound really heals well and does not cause any more suffering for my little one. It is so painful for us!

This boy is tough! Though he screams, he is over the pain very fast...I really hope he will grow up brave and tough.

Dr Tang just called me to check on the little one. He is really nice. He didn't charge us at all for the procedure he performed on son yesterday. It was not his fault. I consulted one of my other Dr and she mentioned such things are not common and even my boss, who saw Dr Tang said he is a really nice Dr unlike some money grabbing ones we saw in private practice.

I am thankful to have such a caring Dr for son.

After this, I really have to give little one a small celebration and bring him out to buy a nice set of clothes for his coming birthday!