Mommy's Homework

This homework I have started yesterday is to read up on activities that can better engage the siblings in, motivating and creating a better learning and bonding environment for the kids.

Ethyl's new school is confirmed, she is both sad and excited about the new start. Sad to leave the school she has been with since she was 22mo, excited because she will have some outdoor activities in the new school as it comes with a big football field.

Since I have enrolled her in half day morning session, I have also drawn up a timetable for her to adhere to for her learning and playtime. This is not a rigid time table, we can make adjustments as we move on. I just want her to better utilise her time and learning to plan her days inadvance and not to waste too much of her precious time.

In out timetable, I slotted in "Family Communications Time" during weekdays. This is a one hour slot (for the time being). I have slotted this slot after dinner, before bedtime. This is the time where we will switch off all forms of programs, will sit around with the kids and chat about the day's happenings or just have some fun together. Probably I we will play Wii together for one or two days!

Since I have a year and a half more to go before Ethyl goes into P1 after we have shifted, I have more or less decided which primary school she will go to. In the Pasir Ris vicinity, Pasir Ris Primary is a better neighbourhood school. I will not go be a volunteer as I really can't stretch my time, we'll take things in our stride. Though I would also love to see her go into Poi Ching (in Tampines), but we are too far from that school.

If my girl is gifted to go into better school, she will in the end. I do not want to push her too much. With her being so enthusiastic about learning, I just hope that we can nurture her the way she ought to be.

Besides for the kids, I am planning to take up a course. This time, I really have to think twice as the commitment is for quite long and I am not sure if I can manage. I have not spoken to Hubby about my intention, but I foresee that he will say things that doesn't please my ears.

Little boy will be going to school next year too! I am sure he will enjoy as much as Ethyl does!

Surgery Journal Final Part – Discharge

As I finished writing the last part of the previous post, I had a tough night struggling with Brayden. We skipped paracetemol (painkiller) for 2 feeds as he was not whiney and “complaining”of pain.

He was not able to sleep well.Hews a grouchy boy and was quite a handful. I tried my very best to and settle him,coax him and calm him, and was totally drained out pretty soon. He woke up every 2 hours and started to feel uncomfy. He was feverish halfway through the night and I worried about it. Quickly buzzed the nurses and had them to take a look at son. He was given paracetemol and very soon, he dozed off after his milk.

So I thought I could rest, little did I know, 15 mins after I dozed off, the nurse came with his antibiotics that needs to be transmitted via IV. This will take about 30mins. No more rest for me.

Little guy was feeling some pain from the transmission, was whiney and grouchy AGAIN! I had a hard time tussling with him, buzzed the nurse again and asked for help.

The nurse slowed down the flow, and very soon, everything was calm and peaceful for me. Though little boy was not sleeping, he was calmer and at least I need not wrestle with him anymore.

It was meant to be 30 minutes, but after the “adjustment”, it took 45 minutes. After settling little guy, it was almost 6am. I was dead tired!

Quickly took a nap and hoping that Brayden will wake up only 8ish. Sigh…he woke up before 7am! I had to carry him, walk around,prepare him to bathe and I was like a zombie! Absolutely drained out from the tough night.

My only saviour will be Mom, who planned to visit with Dad in the morning.

Dr Ng came and said Brayden boy was healing well and looked alert to him. He thinks he is fine, but needs Dr Tang to review him.

Dr Tang came 2 hrs later.

He saw a cranky, grouchy boy and asked me if I want to go back home, so that I can rest and have some help caring for the boy. I did not agree immediately.

“Is Brayden fit enough to be home resting instead of being in the hospital?”

He assured me he is, if anything, give him a call on his mobile. I agreed immediately and quickly called mom and Hubby informing them. I really need a good rest!

Brayden was still cranky last night. He gave both Hubby and myself a hard night! We had to catch our wink in the morning with Mom and Dad’s help with him. Really challenging!

His histology is still not back, probably we will receive next week. TO us, sleep is a luxury…at least for now!

Surgery Journal Part 1 – Day 1 & 2

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Little guy was down just 2 days ago. Paeds saw him, the infected lump had not fully erupted, but we still put him on augmentin as requested and agreed by Dr Tang (neuro surgeon) and Dr Ng (Paeds).

Yesterday afternoon,Mom called around 4ish informing me that Brayden is really not well. He had been very whiney, can’t eat, can’t drink, can’t sleep and refused to lie down. The lump seems bigger and there was discharge.

I hesitated no further and called Dr Tang. He is having surgery cases and had to run, he advised us to be admitted by our paeds, Dr Ng. Dr Ng discussed with Dr Tang briefly and called me. He had made the necessary arrangements and I left work earlier, went back home and brought little one to Mt Alvernia.

He was still whiney and grouchy from hunger, pain and I believe he was also lethargic.

Dr Ng saw us not too long after admission. Dr Tang called him after the surgery and they both are working on Brayden. I feel very much at ease actually. With a regular paeds working with our surgeon, and they both knew one another, it made things much easier for us.

Dr Tang came at 9ish and saw Brayden. He decided that the surgery needs to be performed either on the day itself or today morning. He didn’t want to delay as little boy is suffering and he is running a fever.

I knew I had to trust the Drs. I left the decision to him.

I ask hubby to go home after we have settled all the necessary. It was late, yet I can’t sleep. Seriously, I was really drained out. The night before I already can’t sleep well, and last night, I had to sleep in the hospital. It was not easy.

It pains my heart to see him like that. I really hate to see this happening. How come it has to be him? Is it really my fault? I can’t help but kept asking myself these repeatedly…I sobbed through the night.

However, seeing little one in good medical attention, somehow a part in me felt at ease.

26 March

taken before the surgery

His surgery was scheduled at 1145hrs. We need to fast him, and poor boy…his eyes were red and puffy from the cryings he had the day before.

Both Dr Choo (anaesthetist) and Dr Tang were delayed and poor guy was crying incessantly as he was too hungry and tired.

Finally, the Drs arrived after almost an hour. I was told I could follow him into the OT and make sure he was ok before leaving him in there for the procedure.

I did. I never thought I would be so brave and strong for this! I did not shed a tear; in fact I was so calm and poised then, but the Drs didn’t think so.

They sent me out of the OT with a nurse. They thought I was too unstable emotionally(?).

The supposed 30 minutes surgery took longer than expected. The short wait seemed the longest in my life.

Hearing the voice of Dr Tang, Hubby and I quickly jumped out of our seats and walked to him. As usual, his friendly smiles and assuring words were comforting. He couldn’t understand why the lump was so much bigger than he initially thought and the size of the lump was also different from the MRI scan.

Whatever it is, he did remove everything in there and sent the lump for tests. I hope the results will be good.

Little boy was brave. Dr tang said after the surgery, though under GA, little boy pulled out the mask even before Dr Choo could remove it. I guess he felt uncomfortable. He was still drowsy when we saw him outside the OT.

When the nurses needs to check his BP and take his temperature, he was very uncooperative as he was drowsy and I guess he felt some pain. Ethyl was with him, assuring him jiejie is around and held his hand, trying to comfort the upset brother and gave him assurance that we are there for him. This move is really sweet! I am sure the little guy can feel the love from her too!

the little scar that didn’t look too threatening

It took him about 3 hours to be back to him alert self. His smiles were really comforting to me.

He is now sleeping peacefully next to me. Though he had IV inserted, he was not too affected by it.

I really appreciate the support given to us during this period. Thanks for the SMS-es, IM, comments on facebook, visits and phone calls. We really appreciate! Thank you…

Unforeseen...

Holidays cancelled because of Brayden.

Mom called me yesterday at 4ish telling me he is running a fever at 38.3deg. He has no appetite...very whiney and clingy.

Dr Tang mentioned to seek Dr's advise if he has fever because the fever may be lead by the infection of that lump. So I called Dr Tang and he says the surgery has to be done early as it has been causing the little one to fall sick so frequently.

I just hope that he will not be celebrating his birthday in the ward.

Will We Be Able To Go Eventually?

Hubby and I are planning to bring the kids on a holiday trip, a short one to be precise.


We have decided that Brayden's birthday shall be celebrated overseas (not on the actual day though). As I have to help in the AGM this year, we will be going for the trip in between our (Brayden and mine) birthdays.


Hubby's checking on the air tickets to see if we can have free tix to save some costs. If we do, we can go to Gold Coast! If not, we'll have alternative plans. We shall see how things goes.


Oh, my Ethyl girl wanted to return to HK! She misses the food and Disneyland! Gosh...the Man says, if we return to HK, he will not want to go Disneyland this time. Well...since I am not planning a shopping trip, HK is off my list! I think it's best to go somewhere we have not been before with the kids.

Army Museum & Centrepoint

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We met with my sis and family at Jurong Point 2 for lunch at Ding Tai Fung. All I can say that I am very used to the service and food at Paragon, hence I feel that the food there was not as yummy.

We parked our car at the mall and took a train to catch the feeder bus to the museum.

Doesn’t she look awesome here?

This is our first visit to the Army Museum. Hubby dragged us along….since we had nothing much planned for this weekend, thus we went along.

Not the best decision to go for the trip.

Nonetheless, we still enjoyed. Little boy was tired and cranky though as there was not much for him to see.

Sunday is a boring day. We planned to go out, but then little boy showed signs of runny nose so we decided to head to the mall and have a look at the ergonomic furniture.

Nothing is new…Hubby was indecisive, thus we bought nothing in the end! I guess I know what I want, will pop by later when the house is more ready and hoping to get a better deal from the much awaited GSS!

Nothing much for the day…aimlessly walking here and there. I hate to walk around aimlessly.

The little one is easily amused by Ethyl.

See how happy he is!

Oh…I heart this smile!!!

Brayden’s MRI Scan

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Today is a bad friday! As Hubby is on reservist, I had to bring little guy to the MRI alone. It was challenging. I never like to see kids being “poked'” and “tortured” in the hands of the nurses and doctors.

Us, on our way in the cab.

This little boy was given a 2 bedded ward at Mount E. He is quite popular among the nurses as he is always smiley and responsive to them.

Changed him into the hospital robe, waiting for him to be brought to the diagnostic centre. Poor boy had fasted for more than 4hrs. He was both tired and hungry.

Next thing that happened was not too pleasant. He was inserted cannula, shortly sedated (he cried badly when he was carried away from me), and was “taped” and strapped on the huge cold machine. I could no longer hold back my tears.

That was a traumatic experience for me to see him lying there motionless, the nurses and anaesthetist taped him and “cushion” him, preparing to do the scan.

I had requested to stay with him, the anaesthetist upon seeing me emotionally unstable,assured me that Brayden will be fine, and ask me to take a walk and be back in 30mins.

The longest 30 minutes ever…How i wished I had Hubby around.

My colleague came and accompany me. I fought back my tears while trying to tell her how my heart bleed when I saw how he was strapped on. She consoled me and accompany me back to the ward when Brayden was done with the scan.

Very soon, little one was alert and smiley. Even the nurses were surprised that he took 2 bottles of milk in less than 2 hours!

It was not easy waiting for the report. Then came Dr Tang with his good news! It is even more superficial then the KKH diagnosis! He advised to perform the ops when Bray is over a year old. We are planning it in October.

Surgery must still go on. Albeit it makes me feel much better than before. However, I foresee myself going through another round on emotional swing when he is going for the ops. Which Mommy will not worry even when it is the most slightest thing?

Not to forget all kind friends and relatives who sms-ed me asking about him, and giving me moral support. I really appreciate.

Random

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Some recent pictures of the little ones.

...

Last evening, Mom was helping me with Brayden so that I can settle my renovation stuff that I need to bring and show my contractor today. Something she said, made me feel sad and kept thinking about it.

“希望明天去看医生时，医生说你不需要开刀”

I corrected Mom’s sentence. Told her that surgery is inevitable in Bray’s case, and it is just a matter of how extensive the whole procedure might be (I hope it’s a superficial one). She was saddened. I saw her eyes red…

“可怜，小小年纪就要去开刀。不好的让婆婆来承受，让你健康长大。”

I can’t really sleep well last night. Was tossing and turning in bed, thinking about the scan on Friday. When Brayden was frail and weak as a newborn, I made a promise to Guanyin that I will be a vegetarian on the 1st and 15th of every lunar month in retun for Brayden’s good health. I think a Mom would do anything for their kid(s).

Ethyl kept asking me if Brayden needs to stay at the hospital. I assured her that our little guy will be back tomorrow when she returns from school. She told me the same old thing, “Mommy, if didi goes operation and you don’t want me to go, I will stay at home and I will cry for him.”

She will hug our boy and stroke his face “Poor thing Brayden, be brave ok?”

Disney on Ice

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Brought Ethyl to Disney on Ice on Saturday. Though I was pre-occupied with many things, I did not neglect my little princess. I am sure she loves her princesses, especially Belle.

I enjoyed too! I promised Ethyl to bring her back next year.

Update on Brayden

It is with a heavy heart. I can be tough, but when it comes to this, I really hope I can be stronger enough.

I have finalised the arrangement for Brayden. He needs to be admitted to Mount E this friday for his MRI. As he is a baby, he will need to be monitored before and after the scan of his brain.

Hubby will not be around, meaning, I will be alone throughout the procedure. I hope I can manage well.

I pray ernestly for the best results.

Please bear with me...

I am making some changes as I have grown tired of the template...please bear with me...

Trust My Maternal Instinct

Before we eve brought Brayden to any doctor, I was already uncomfy with the swollen bump. My instinct told me, "go, bring him to the paeds immediately!"

Hubby said "Well, we went and the Dr says he is ok what."

I asked him when, and how come I do not recall the slightest bit of it. I told him, no way I am going to delay any further with regards to this and I shall just bring him to KKH as our paeds was not around.

Both Mom and Hubby were not interested to bring him to KKH, kept discouraging me. I packed up, and told them, if they are not interested, i can hail a cab and go myself. I am stubborn, very stubborn...But it is for the better of my kid, I have the right to be stubborn isn't it?

And the story were as previous posts. I thank everyone for the concern. The more important for me to do is to prepare myself mentally. It'll pain any Mommy to see the kid go through such a thing...

I know Brayden is a brave little one, so will I be too! More updates will be after his MRI scan.

footnote:

Ethyl, the ever dting big sis to Brayden said, "Mommy, when didi goes operation, I will cry. I know I cannot go, but I will stay at home and cry cos didi so poor thing..."

Both our eyes were wet...I know she is sensible and she cares. Love you baby, you are also my pillar of support!

We Will be Brave!

When I heard what the Paediatric surgeon said at KKH, my heart sank. Brayden needs to go surgery at such a tender age? Braving a heavy heart, I tried holding back my tears of worries and sat quietly in the car. Looking at his chubby face, my heart was stabbed by a thousand blades and it was bleeding.

Hubby was least bit sensitive. He saw me sobbing and asked in the most insensitive tone, “What are you doing?” I need a pat on the shoulder more at that point of time.

I ignored him, wipe my tears and sat there quietly.

My colleagues were nice. They advised me to seek second opinion. Well, I will and had made an appointment with Dr Chui Chan Hon at Mount E after stepping out of KKH. The surgeon at KKH didn’t even look at other possibilities and decided on a surgery just by a touch on that bump. I am sorry; I do not trust his professional advise at all!

Dr Chui’s appointment was on Saturday. He is very nice and friendly. We discussed about Brayden’s condition and his insights made me feel more at ease. However, he advised we go to a paediatric neurosurgeon, Dr Tang Kok Kee.

Dr Chui even made a call himself and we managed to slot in right after our appointment with Dr Chui. Dr Chui didn’t want to charge us consultation for this.

Dr Tang is a friendly doctor. He explained to us Brayden’s conditions and made recommendations. He knew we are very worried, and told us the possibilities. He advised on a MRI to be done for Brayden. Brayden will need to be sedated while doing this scan.

I am thanksful for Dr Chui to recommend Dr Tang to us. He himself is a father to 2 young kids and he assures us that he will make the best arrangements for Brayden during the scan. He will arrange an anaesthetician that specialises in kids and make good arrangements for us. He even gave us his mobile phone number to contact him when in doubt.

This week Hubby is away for reservist. He wanted me to go for the MRI together when he is back. He is worried. We shall see if there can be any appointment made this week, else we’ll schedule for next week.

I am Touched...

I must record this. I went back home late last night and my girl was sweet as usual. Followed me in and out here and there…

While I was having dinner at 10-ish, she insisted to sit by my side and chat with me to keep me company even though I will prefer to turn in early. We chatted and when I finished my dinner, I told her to go to bed while I wash the dishes.

She came out in mere seconds after adjourning to the room and said to me, “Poor thing Mommy, you have to wash the plates yourself. Next time I learn to cook and cook for you when you all grow old. I will have a maid to wash for you too.”

I asked, “Are you sure?” She said, “Yes. The maid will help look after you if you can’t walk.”

I do not wish that I will be less mobile when I am older.

This little darling is such a dear…I told her I only need her to put in her best foot for her studies and behave herself and look after Brayden. All others we’ll leave it to later.

Oh, and she told Mom her hobby is to write, read and study! I hope she will be so enthusiastic about learning when she is older.

What We Bought To-Date

We went Mayer to get a cooker hob, hood and as a bonus, Hubby got me an oven! Thanks Hubbby *muacks*!

I had loved Ariston's hobs for a while...Hubby obliged and we went hob hunting at IMM last evening! Ariston's PH 930 MST - Tre IX a 3-cooker hob. We gave up an induction hob as we felt that it may not be really useful in our case.

For our hood, we opted for Delizia DZH 519 and top up the balance. This hood is a high performer and both Mom and Hubby loves it...grab it! Though I prefer another one, I gave in because....he got me an oven!
Ariston's FZ 61.1 IX. Though I could have gotten another higher range one, I chose to "save" money and compromise with this. *smiles* This also means I have to bake more for them.

Till date, we have also gotten ourselves mattress from Sealy. The kids also had their bed frames, mattresses, and an additional rollaway bed and matteress. Hubby insisted on having a 3rd mattress for the kids(?!). Pretty redundant and a waste of money I thought.

Now, we need to start shopping for sinks, basins, rain shower, taps, toilet bowls, lightings etc! Sofa and dining table shall be later when the reno starts.

Nest week, we'll join the islanders to comb through the IT show for a new TV, home theatre system, desktop and a new laptop for myself! I love Sony's Vaio for a while already. Let's see what's the deal there! I need a light weight lappy to lug around as I can use it while waiting for Ethyl to end her enrichment classes or even swimming lessons!

We are getting our keys to the new flat in the first half of april. Quite exciting! Can't wait to start the reno!

Schools Visiting for Ethyl

After our 1st appointment at HDB yesterday, we brought Ethyl for schools visit. Well, Hubby and I could have spent some couple time, but I decided to grab full use of the available timing to get at least one thing off my to-do list.

I have been trying to shortlist the schools, and we visited those that I think more suitable for us. Having said that, Ethyl has her views too. Besides for Ethyl, I am also planning for Brayden's; thus I also asked about the playgroup classes available.

The first school is very neat, clean and tidy. The principal has been very patient and kind explaining the curriculum to me over and over again. There are enrichments provided too! I love this place and Hubby too! Hubby felt that enrolling Ethyl in full day is more beneficial, I thought otherwise.

Seriously, I prefer to have her at home at noon for napping and me-time.

The second school is pretty near our new place, near pasir ris park. As much as I love the curricular, there are things that I am not totally impressed. The environment is a little cluttered to me. The enrichments are only provided to full day students and Ethyl is not under that category.

More or less settled. We need to visit one more school before finalising...Probably, we will drop by on Monday.

Gloomy

As I was happily immersing myself in the attention that both Brayden and Ethyl gave me, lighting struck!

Brayden has this bump at the back of his head since birth and all along, I felt at ease because 2 paeds and the Dr from polyclinic all assures me it is ok. During CNY, I noticed that this bump doubled in size and looks red and swollen.

This week, the same thing happened again...I told myself I shall not delay. We rushed to KKH for a diagnosis. Dr said that is called posterior occipital lymphadenitis. It is the lymph node that was swollen.

Brayden was given a course of Augmentin, and his review is on next Monday by a paeds surgeon.

I am praying hard that no surgery is required to remove that lymph node, and that it is really harmless in his case. I'll be relieved if the swelling is caused by a local infection.

My 10 Month-old

It seems so fast that this little one just turned 10mo over the last weekend! He seems to have grown up quite a fair bit when I compare his previous pictures.

He is turning 1 in less than 2 months' time, and initally I was planning a birthday party for him. However, after much discussion with Hubby, we decided to keep it a domestic affair as we will also be having house warming some months later.

Since we do not have a house of our own by then, we shall celebrate for him at Mom's place.

Mom in law offered us her place and wanted a celebration for Brayden, I rejected her "kind" intention. Since Ethyl's birthday she was not actively involved and couldn't remember at all, Brayden's birthday shall not be very much different either.

I am petty and I am very upset by the unfair treatment.

Let's not digress...I am planning to go for a short trip on Brayden's birthday and now waiting for Hubby to approve. Let's hope he approves of the trip for ourselves!

It's the Closet

A little post on the search of stuff for our new home. Closet is really important and I am particular for my wardrobe. This time, I really prefer a modular wardrobe.

Today, we went Expo and I saw this Closet Design having promo. It is $2000 nett inclusive GST for a 8ft modular. I almost signed up for it on impulse! But for 3 rooms, a total of $6000, I think I need to give it some thoughts.

Am now in the midst of checking some info on IDs and contractors. ID would save me from alot of hassle in terms of planning, which means I will pay them more too. Contractors I need to coordinate. I am still discussing with Hubby and we'll see how things goes.

We are going for our 1st appointment this Friday. So exciting!